Friday, October 22, 2010

golf lessons

* warning, the following contains heavy sarcasm, and is a joke loosely based on an actual conversation. And I truly do love those teens of the '00's

I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while, I've been too busy judging the youth of today. The problem, as everyone knows, is that the youth of generation "next" (and you know who you are) are only concerned with having fun. Since when was life fun, I'd like to know? Since when was work an entertaining romp? Since never.

Mary Poppins tried to sell us that bill of goods 40 years ago, but most of us were smart enough to know better. But not the youth of today. Everything is fun, fun, fun. Everything is a circus with free, limitless pony rides. With their texting and their youtube shows, I tell you! Well, anyway.

The thing that really bothers me about this listless, vile generation is that they have no concept of winning. They have yet to learn a valuable lesson: that winning is everything. I hate it. Work and winning go hand and hand, but don't tell that to the teens of the 00's, with their Rihanna and their krump dancing.

Perfect example: The youth playing indoor mini-golf. As the lone winning-minded adult on my team I felt I had the duty to teach them about winning. But no- they were all cheering for the other teams and high fiving their mistakes away with some good natured ribbing thrown in for good measure. They weren't learning about real life. But they were sure having fun! Even the other leaders were embracing this whole new 'lets just play for fun attitude'. Big enablers.

I don't know what to do about the youth of today. It makes me sick even thinking about it. Do you have any ideas? What's that? Paper routes? That's so 80's. What else? Free car washes? Good luck! They just make fun posters and soak each other with suds. I give up.

I'm not angry, just disappointed. Well, I'm like 60% angry and 40% disappointed. I bet forty years from now our President will be some Red Bull addict who sits at home playing Garage Band. It's basically the apocalypse. Sound bleak? Well, don't kill the messenger.


  1. I do think we're doing our kids a disservice today. Too many of them launch into a prolonged adolescence, with a sense of entitlement that won't quit. They don't want to live in the real world because they've had too little experience of real world consequences.

    As far as the winning thing goes, though, I've never cared about winning at sports. Never. It's just a game to me. But I care a lot about "winning" in my life, in the sense of being successful and working hard for results.

    So lack of ambition doesn't HAVE to be synonymous with lack of competitive instinct, if it makes you feel any better...


  2. It's time to sharpen your elbows and make them cry!

  3. The pretext of this post was that we had a stake activity, and a few people were really too serious about it (even the leaders) and so I went on my typical snarcastic rant that I'm know for and this post was the product. Happy reading